The Conversion of Saint Paul
Saul, still breathing murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples, went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus which would empower him to arrest and bring to Jerusalem anyone he might find, man or woman, living according to the new way. As he traveled along and was approaching Damascus, a light from the sky suddenly flashed about him. He fell to the ground and at the same time heard a voice saying, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?” “Who are you, sir?” he asked. The voice answered, “I am Jesus, the one you are persecuting. Get up and go into the city, where you will be told what to do.” The men who were traveling with him stood there speechless. They had heard the voice but could see no one. Saul got up from the ground unable to see, even though his eyes were open. They had to take him by the hand and lead him into Damascus. For three days he continued blind, during which time he neither ate nor drank. (Acts 9:1-9)
Today we celebrate the feastday of the Conversion of Saint Paul, God’s chosen instrument for bringing Christ to the Nations. It is difficult to imagine a more unlikely Apostle. St. Luke’s description in the Acts of the Apostles describes a man whose entire being was centered upon the destruction of Christianity. He is said to have been “breathing murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples”. His very life was being sustained through the arrest, persecution and death of Christians. Yet God chose him, opened his eyes to the truth, and led Paul to bring the Gospel to the ends of the earth.
Imagine being part of the Christian community that welcomed Paul as a newly baptized Christian. Just recently at one of our neighboring churches in Knoxville, a man walked into the sanctuary with a gun and began to shoot members of the community gathered in prayer. He was arrested and is now behind bars, but I can’t help but wonder what the reaction would be if upon his release from prison, he were to show up at our church asking to become a member. How would we welcome him? Would we welcome him?
Feasts that honor saints like Paul are challenging, but they give me hope. They communicate that no one is beyond the mercy of God, that no sin is too great for God’s forgiveness. That’s only the beginning of the good news, however. Not only is Paul forgiven, he goes on to become the greatest of the Apostles. Paul’s story should demonstrate that God has a plan for each of us that sin can only overcome if we let it. If the story of Paul’s conversion is not enough proof, we need only look to the Bible for more examples. Joining Paul among the ranks of murderers are Moses and David (who also happened to be an adulterer). There is Jacob, who becomes the father of the twelve tribes of Israel by stealing his brother’s birthrite. In the New Testament we find St. Peter, who abandons Jesus when he is most in need, St. Thomas who doubted Christ’s resurrection and St. Mary Magdalene who was possessed by seven demons. The list goes on.
One of the most common temptations faced by Christians is to spend our time judging others for their sins. It is easy to succumb to this temptation. The fact that we are all sinners provides frequent opportunities to see others fall. But judging the sins of others is very damaging to a Christian’s spiritual health. Paying too much attention to the sins of others can blind us to our own sins. Perhaps the most the most alarming thing about this particular sin is that it allows us to put ourselves in the place of God. A person who continues to challenge me in this regard is Thomas Merton. In his book, New Seeds of Contemplation he writes,
Do not think that you can show your love for Christ by hating those who seem to be His enemies on earth. Suppose they really do hate Him: nevertheless He loves them, and you cannot be united with Him unless you love them too.
If you hate the enemies of the Church instead of loving them, you too will run the risk of becoming an enemy of the Church, and of Christ; for He said: “He that is not with me is against me.” Therefore if you do not side with Christ by loving those that He loves, you are against Him.
But Christ loves all men. Christ died for all men. And Christ said there was not greater love than that a man should lay down his life for his friend.
Each time I reflect upon the life of Saint Paul, I am reminded that God calls me to pray for sinners and for their conversion, not to judge them. It is also an opportunity to notice my own sins, especially the ones I don’t normally see and to seek the Lord’s mercy.
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